My Salvation
by CharryWotter
Summary: AU. Dean is a serial killer intent on finding and killing as many people as possible. Cas is a college graduate trying to make the world a better place. When they cross paths, and Cas becomes one of Dean's potential victims, can Cas save Dean from his darkness before he is murdered?/DESTIEL
1. A Killer

Dean Winchester pulled up his beloved impala at the house. Cursing under his breath, he hurried to cut the engine and scrambled inside.

Locking the door behind him, Dean hoped to be able to sneak up quietly to his room, but his brother was sitting in the living room watching tv.

"Dean? Is that you?" Sam's voice was small, as though he expected there to be a murderer coming in. Of course, there was, but it was different. Dean would never harm Sammy.

"It's me," Dean answered gruffly. "Why aren't you in bed asleep?"

"I got scared," came the reply. The tv was turned off, and Dean started up the steps, hoping to avoid further conversation.

Unfortunately, luck was not on his side. Sam quickly followed Dean up the stairs. He was tall for fifteen, but weedy as a reed. And annoying as hell.

"Where were you, Dean?" Sam asked, stepping in front of Dean to block the door to his room. "You've been going out like this before, but never this late."

Dean scrambled for an excuse. After all, it was after one in the morning. "I was…uh…out with Marley."

"Marley? Doesn't she have a curfew?"

"Sneaked out," Dean said, pushing past Sam to get to his room. Dean felt bad using the preppy cheerleader as his excuse, but what else could he say? Sam couldn't know of his sick obsession. Watching the blood drain out of his victim, as their panicked eyes flitted around the room, Dean felt a sense of power.

"Fine, but next time, I'm telling dad!" Sam crossed his arms and stood in the doorway.

Dean laughed, trying to cover the bloodstain on his shirt. "Dad? When's the last time we saw him? Month ago?"

Sam glared at Dean and wiped a tear from his eye. "He'll be back eventually."

"Not until he's finished tracking that evil dude down. And until that happens, I'm in charge. No more questions about what I'm doing. Got it?" Dean flopped down on his bed, hoping he wouldn't have to fight his brother.

Luckily, Sam ran out of the room. "I hate you!" he called, slamming his own bedroom door shut.

Dean sighed as he slipped the gleaming dagger out from under his shirt and hid it underneath the clothes in his dresser.

"So what if my dad's an FBI agent?" he muttered, kicking the ground. "All he cares about is tracking down the guy who murdered Mary! I can do whatever I want!"

Dean dropped on his bed again and looked up to the ceiling.

"Whatever I want."

…

 **SEVEN YEARS LATER**

Dean drove home quickly in the impala like he had done a million times before. This time, though, he was still angry. Not even killing the helpless man had done away with his dark thoughts.

When he got to his apartment, Dean hid his dagger as he always did, even though he had stopped using it a while back. There were all sorts of weapons in the trunk of his car.

Dean's cell phone was blinking, but he ignored it. He knew what day it was. Sam was graduating from college. And he wanted Dean to come to the ceremony. "Like hell I would!"

John was out, tracking Mary's killer again. When Dean was young, he'd dreamed of joining his father in the hunt, and John was only too happy to oblige. Years of being trained to fight, moving around schools constantly, and looking out after Sam while they were home alone had changed Dean.

His first kill had been accidental. The man had startled him, but years of John's training gave Dean the instinct to stab first, question later.

Watching the innocent man die gave Dean something he'd been missing for years. That was when his dream profession had changed.

Now it was a weekly occurrence for him. Dean had the skills to leave no fingerprints or hair, make a quick, clean kill, and get out without raising any hairs. It was a kind of strange irony, that the FBI skills he'd been taught were used to murder.

Currently, Dean was in California. Every couple of weeks, he would drive to a new state and live there. Credit card fraud kept him with enough money, so Dean never held a job.

Meanwhile, Sam was busy becoming successful and liked. He even had a girlfriend, who he was planning to propose to. It hurt that Sam didn't need Dean's protection anymore, but Dean was definitely happier now that he lived alone and no one nosed in his business when he returned at late hours with new bruises and blood dripping off his hands.

Dean sighed as he flicked the light off. What had his life come to?

….

Sam sighed as he checked his phone. Dean still hadn't answered, and the graduation ceremony was only a week away.

"What's wrong, honey?" Jess asked, walking over to his bed in her smurf pajamas.

Sam pushed his hair back. "Nothing. It's all fine."

He thought back to high school, when everything changed. Sam had grown up the rebel of the family, always questioning John and not wanting to hunt killers. One of his teachers told him that he didn't have to become an FBI agent; that he, not John, decided where his life would go.

Dean didn't have anyone like that.

Also, being older, there was always more pressure being put on Dean. To help John, to join the force and work alongside him. "The family business," John would say with a smile.

There were long weeks where Dean was the only one in charge and John was out on work. At first, when Dean was starting high school, he still tried to get good grades so he could be what John wanted. But something happened.

Dean began going out late at night and coming home with no explanation. His grades in school dropped and although he still practiced shooting a gun, it was without the same drive.

And all Sam could do was watch it happen.

Bobby, the other FBI agent working with John, saw in Dean what his own father missed. "That boy's a fighter," he often remarked to Sam, "but without guidance, with John always being gone, the violence will come out in the worst ways."

Sam shook his head and straightened his homework due the next day.

It had been hard to watch Dean throw his life away. When he turned 18, Dean fled, taking John's impala without asking.

"And even then," Sam whispered bitterly, ignoring Jess' concerned look, "Dean was still the prize. John still wants him. But then the second I want to go to Stanford and become something other than an agent, I get disowned."

It was all too much.

Though it was only 8:00 at night, Sam shut off the lights and climbed into bed.

…

The next day was bright and sunny, with birds chirping, as Dean set off along the sidewalk. "Time to choose a victim," he whispered.

That was how he spent his mornings. Finding someone to kill.

Usually the unlucky soul would be a father or mother. The pain in their eyes would be greater as they realized their kids wouldn't have them anymore. It was always a bonus if the next day, Dean could see the mourning kids.

One time, he even had the audacity to attend the funeral.

Today, Dean chose to head over to the nearest park. Parks were always a great place to find loving parents. Another location was clothing stores, but the town he was staying in didn't have very good ones.

Dean sat down on the park bench and pulled out a newspaper to reduce suspicion.

He glanced up every few seconds and his eyes searched the park for potential candidates.

"Hi." A gravelly voice jerked Dean's eyes up. Standing next to the bench was a man about his age, wearing a long trenchcoat. His eyes were serious and as blue as his hair was brown. "Can I sit here?"

Dean shifted and cursed in his head. "Sure," he said jovially, smiling like he was happy. "I'm Dean."

"Cas," the newcomer responded, taking a seat.

"So, what brings you here?" Dean asked when the silence stretched too long. "Do you have a kid?"

Cas frowned. "No. I was coming to enjoy the sunshine. Do you have a child?"

Dean looked out to the kids playing on the playstructure. "I don't. I'm new here, just checking the place out."

"It's a very nice neighborhood," Cas said, but he didn't smile. It seemed to Dean that his mouth was fixed in a permanent frown. "Welcome."

"Uh, thank you," Dean said uncomfortable, wishing he could be anywhere else at the moment. "I don't think I'll be staying long."

"You should come to my house for dinner. As a way of welcoming you here."

Dean looked into Cas' eyes. _Now, those are some eyes I would enjoy seeing filled with pain,_ Dean thought and he nodded. "What's your address?"

Cas told him, and Dean stood up to evade further questions. "I'll see you later," Dean said, and he was careful to leave slowly to not look suspicious.

Cas watched Dean go, and sadness filled his face. The man was very handsome, but there was something…broken about him. Cas couldn't put his finger on it.

Either way, Cas was very much looking forward to the dinner.

"Soon," he promised himself; then he left the park without a backwards glance.

…

Please review!


	2. The Man Who is Going to Kill You

Thanks, fairytailasaurus, for that hilarious review! You're the main reason I kept writing!

….

As Castiel checked the time again, he shook his head. It was 6:20. Dean said he'd arrive at 6:00.

"Stupid," Cas told himself. "Why would you even invite a stranger to dinner? Why would you even expect him to show up? He's a stranger!"

But Dean was a handsome stranger; that was the problem. Ever since he entered college and left his small hometown, Cas had found himself being unable to resist handsome men.

It wasn't that Cas thought Dean was gay. Like most handsome men, he probably wasn't. Cas just couldn't help but introduce himself, however.

"Was I too forward?" Cas sat down at his dinner table, which was fully set and ready to be eaten. The only problem was Dean wasn't sitting there with him. Cas sighed. "I probably creeped him out."

Putting his head down on the table, Cas wept.

…

Meanwhile, Dean sat in his impala in front of the address Cas had given him. He couldn't bring himself to enter.

"I can't get to know my victim," Dean moaned. "That defeats the purpose."

Dean found himself wishing that he'd never said yes to Cas. He would have found some unlucky family, done the dirty deed, and then left without a trace.

Even when he had agreed to dinner, Dean had known it was a bad idea. Something about Cas had compelled him to say yes.

Maybe it was those startling blue eyes.

Dean cursed when he saw that it was already 6:30. _Make a decision. Either go in now, or leave the town._

Dean gripped the gun hidden under his jacket and felt better about the whole situation.

"Who knows," he said, grinning. "In three hours' time, I may have a body to bury."

With that, Dean stepped out of the impala and rang the front doorbell.

…

Cas jumped when he heard the doorbell ring. He straightened from where he was reading on the couch, and rushed to the door, heart thumping.

Could it be?

Yes. It was Dean.

Dean was looking uncomfortable, standing on his doorstep with one hand in his pocket.

"Come in," Cas offered when he realized Dean wasn't going to apologize for being so late. "I'll go reheat the dinner."

Dean smiled, but Cas could tell that it was to humor him.

Hurrying to the kitchen, Cas quickly stuck his homemade burgers in the microwave. They _had_ been warm at 6:00…

Cas snuck a quick look at his dinner guest. Dean had sat at the table and was reclining in his seat as if he owned the place.

Feeling eyes on him, Dean looked over to the kitchen, and Cas quickly hurried to grab the burgers.

…

Dean knew he wasn't an awkward person. He had plenty of practice with people, and was skilled at charming and manipulating them. Words flowed from his tongue and he always knew what to say.

But now, sitting down for dinner with a man he was planning to kill, Dean couldn't find anything to say.

"These burgers are amazing," Dean told Cas, cursing himself in his head.

Cas smiled and inclined his head. "So, what brings you to this town?"

Dean frowned and chewed his burger slowly to think of an excuse. "I don't know," he finally said. "I just wanted to travel, and my brother is graduating from college near here."

 _Damn it. Why did I even bring up Sam?_ Dean shook his head. Something about Cas compelled him to share about his life.

He would have to try harder to control his tongue.

"Your brother? What college?"

"Stanford." Dean didn't elaborate, so Cas was forced to.

"I have a brother also. His name's Gabriel. He's also 22."

Dean was annoyed that Cas had assumed Sam's age. "Sammy's 23. He was held back in school."

"Why's that?"

Cas was so nosy! Only the knowledge that he would kill the man soon allowed him to speak truthfully. Dean fingered the gun under his jacket. Even if he told Cas about the murders, Cas would never reach his phone on time.

"Our dad's in the FBI. We were move around a lot as kids, never staying in one place for more than a few weeks. Sammy is a genius, but he wasn't taught as much, so he had to stay back a grade to learn."

"Well, I'm glad he made it to college," Cas sipped his wine. "I couldn't see Gabriel doing the same. He's such a prankster!"

"Yeah, well, you should've seen Sammy before he left. We'd get in full on prank wars."

Cas wrinkled his brow. "Before he left?"

Dean couldn't understand why he was allowing his victim to learn so much about him. "My dad…uh…disowned him." He could tell Cas wasn't going to talk until his story was out, so after a pause, Dean continued. "Sam didn't want to enter the family business; to be an FBI agent and find the criminal who killed our mom. He wanted to go to college. My dad basically told him to never come back if he left."

Cas' eyes widened. "Are you an FBI agent?"

Dean laughed. He was the exact opposite, and Cas soon would be seeing a new side of him. "You wish."

"What?"

Dean quickly cleared his throat. "I mean—no. I wasn't disowned, either, if that's what you're about to ask."

But that wasn't what Cas was thinking. "Why did you say that I'd wish you to be an FBI agent?"

Dean scrambled for an excuse. "Did I say that?" he asked. "I meant that my dad wants it, not you."

Cas' blue eyes blazed with fury, and he stood up from the table. "Don't lie to me! You said it because you think that I'm like all the rest, wanting a brooding, mysterious guy! You're making fun of me! I bet Sam's not a real person! Yes, I'm gay! _I wasn't hitting on you when I invited you to dinner!_ " Cas stood panting, looking into Dean's green eyes.

Dean sat for a moment working through his words. Cas was gay?

Finally, Dean brushed aside the conflicted thoughts that arose and he stood up, too. "I haven't lied to you! And I won't have you insulting Sammy like that! I may have accidentally told you too much of my life, but I wasn't making fun of you! I don't care about your sexuality!"

 _You don't?_ A voice in Dean's head asked, but he shoved it away.

Cas blinked; then he slowly sat down. "I am sorry," Cas said in that deep voice of his. "I misjudged you."

 _It's time,_ Dean decided.

He walked over to where Cas sat at the table. "That's right. You definitely misjudged me."

Cas looked up at the mysterious figure who stood above him. "Who even are you?"

There was a click, and before Cas knew it, a gun was being held to his head.

And Dean spoke. "I am the man who is going to kill you."


	3. Guilty

Thank you for your reviews!

crankthatphan: I'm glad you liked it! Your review meant a lot!

TheCandyChild: I can tell you like whump :) Hope this chapter works for you!

…

Cas sat at his kitchen table, frozen with fear, unable to think as Dean tied him up with rough rope that dug into his skin. Luckily, he was wearing his new trenchcoat, so the rope didn't come in contact with his skin.

Dean worked efficiently, and it was obvious that he knew what he was doing.

Cas closed his eyes.

There was no way out of this.

…

Dean had to slip away when he saw that Cas had given up. Usually, victims' hopeless expressions gave him a surge of power or glee, but now he just felt sick.

Dean entered the nearest room and shut the door behind him. He couldn't stand to see Cas' limp form, looking extra small with the large trenchcoat he was wearing.

Looking around with interest, Dean found himself standing in what had to be Castiel's bedroom. The walls were a pale blue and complimented the dark blue blankets on Cas' bed, which was in the far back corner.

The room was simple and neat, without any decoration. Besides the bed, Cas only had a desk, which had only one item on top of it, a picture.

Dean walked over despite himself and held up the photograph. Cas was in it, in the middle of a large group of people.

He looked to be about fifteen. There was a redheaded girl on his left, and a smaller boy. On Cas' right was more people. There were three older boys and two adults.

With a jolt, Dean realized that he was seeing Cas' family. They were all smiling genuine smiles (save for one of the older boys, who was smirking), and they looked so happy that Dean threw the photo down to the floor in a wave of rage, where it shattered.

As Dean realized what he had done and went to scoop up the pieces, he felt a deep ache in his chest. Dean told himself it had nothing to do with how happy Cas was with his family, how he didn't have an absent father or dead mother, nothing whatsoever.

Glaring one more time at the picture, Dean left the room and walked back to Cas.

Cas' eyes were still shut tightly, but now his lips were moving. He was praying. Some of Dean's victims had done this before they were killed, so why was he feeling so damn guilty?

Dean rubbed his temples. The whole job was messing with his head. _Next time, I don't go to dinner with the one I will kill._

Cas finally opened his startling blue eyes when Dean pressed the side of his knife Cas' face. They were scared and resigned, but the spark in them had not completely been put out. Dean hated himself for being glad about that fact.

Pressing the knife point to Cas' cheek, Dean steadied himself and prepared to make the first incision. He pictured all the injustice in his life, all the times where he was made to be in charge, where he had to move schools, where he had to lie to Sam about what their dad was doing. Rage boiled up in Dean; his guilt was gone; he was pressing the knife in…

When two deep blue pools cut into his haze.

Blinking furiously, Dean felt reality fall over him. Had the hell had Cas' eyes manage to dissipate all of his anger?

Either way, Dean could tell there was no going back. Guilt lay over him like a heavy blanket, and he let the knife drop to the ground as he stared at the red drop of blood dripping down Castiel's cheek like a tear.

Cas looked surprised but wary as he saw that Dean had stopped. It made Dean angry, but not the same angry as when he killed a person. Just…frustrated.

Cas had an effect on Dean that made him very uncomfortable. Not even Sammy could cut into one of Dean's rages.

Breathing heavily, Dean sat on the ground as he remembered…

 _Dean returned home from his most recent murder, blood still on his hands. He had been hoping to blow off steam—John had delayed his return by two months more than the money he left them could provide. Dean wanted to forget everything, forget that he and Sammy hadn't eaten a full meal in a week, forget that their clothes were wearing thin and Sam needed new school supplies._

 _Killing the man had certainly helped, and Dean even managed to take his wallet (which contained only a $50 bill), but returning home, Dean was still in a bad mood. Sam greeted his brother, but Dean brushed him off._

 _"I don't want to deal with you tonight, Sammy," he said, bloody hands stuffed in his pockets._

 _"Dean…it's just, my computer died and I think I need a new one." Sammy's voice was pathetic and it made Dean angrier._

 _"Not my problem, okay?" Dean started up the stairs. "I don't have the money."_

 _"Dean, please," Sam followed him. "There's a school paper I have to turn in by Friday, and I can't keep writing them out by hand. My teacher threatened me with detention!"_

 _"And you think I care?" Dean had reached his limit. He knocked someone to the ground, and pounded his fists on them._

 _Suddenly, Dean's world was on fire. Sparks were everywhere, and the only thing that mattered was the person he was punching. Skin on skin contact; hearing distant screams of pain and feeling sticky, wet blood collect on his knuckles._

 _When Dean stopped, it was only to wipe his knuckles, which had become too slippery with blood to hit with. That was when he realized what he had done._

 _Sam ended up getting a detention the next day at school, when he told his teacher he had gotten in a fight._

 _When he got home, Dean wasn't there._

 _But there was a brand new laptop sitting on his bed._

 _They had never brought up the incident since._

…

Sorry for making you guys wait so long for the update!

Also, if there's a character you want to see more of in the story, just review! If you want more whump, just review! More fighting? Just review!


	4. No Chick Flick Moments

Thank you for the reviews! Also, many thanks to those who followed and/or favorite the story!

crankthatphan: Thanks for the encouragement! Sam and Lucifer, coming right up!

Fairytailasaurus: YOU'RE A TIME LORD? Don't worry—your secret's safe with me as long as I can be your companion :P Also, YOUR LONG REVIEWS WERE THE BEST! Sam and Gabe will definitely appear after all those great words!

Without further ado...

…

Dean didn't know how long he sat in front of his very much alive victim, recalling his worst mistakes. He had no idea how Cas affected him in such a strong way, but he didn't like it.

When Dean finally stood up and stretched, he was surprised to find that an hour had passed. The stars were out, and although Cas was awake, his eyes were noticeably drooping.

Dean rubbed his neck. What should he do?

Mulling over his options, Dean found a beer in Cas' kitchen and took a long swig. The problem wasn't what Dean had to do; the problem was what Dean _was able to do._

Killing Cas was the smartest solution. He'd never tell the police anything, his death would go unsolved, Dean could skip town.

The only problem was that Dean didn't know if he had the nerve to kill the broken man sitting and looking very pathetic with his mussed dark hair and oversized trenchcoat.

Dean was so weak, it made him sick sometimes.

Another hour passed as Dean tried to get up the nerve to kill Cas, but somehow he couldn't. Even when Dean held his gun to Cas' face for ten whole minutes, the man's silent tears froze Dean's finger on the trigger.

 _Son of a bitch!_

Finally, Dean decided he needed to wait. He could kill Castiel in the morning, after sleeping out whatever problem he was having.

"Today's your lucky day, Cas," Dean said roughly as he picked up the chair Cas was bound to and moved it to the man's bedroom.

Cas shook himself alert and watched with wary eyes as Dean cut his landline. He didn't know why Dean hadn't yet killed him, but he was very grateful. There was still hope.

Besides, tomorrow was Castiel's birthday. Although he didn't exactly enjoy the way his night was turning out so far, Cas was very glad of the fact.

Cas' brothers and sister had made it a tradition to come over for dinner every year on his birthday. As long as Cas held out for twenty hours, a small army of his own flesh and blood would walk in and overpower Dean.

Speak of the devil. Dean entered Castiel's room, having turned off all the lights in the house and locking the door.

Though he was frightened, once again, something about Dean tore away at his willpower and ability to think clearly. "This is how you repay me? I don't understand."

Dean sat on Cas' bed, facing the chair he was tied up in. "What?"

Cas frowned. "Why would you plan to kill me after I invited you to dinner?"

Shifting uncomfortably, Dean felt an emotion rise that he hadn't dealt with since he was a small child: guilt. And now, of all times! "Don't pretend you know everything."

Cas could feel some kind of emotional hurt coming from the other man. He was obviously messed up, and deserved to be locked away…but Cas couldn't help but want to be on Dean's side. "Let me ask you, then. Why do you want to kill me?"

"I don't know," Dean shrugged, not giving the question much thought. "You're a person. You gave me your address."

"Then why haven't you killed me?" _Stop talking, Castiel,_ he reminded himself, _if you wait you'll be rescued. You don't want your family finding your body._

Dean crossed his arms and uncrossed them. The room suddenly felt oppressive, and Dean felt like a cornered animal. "I am able to kill you. And I will. I'm just waiting!"

"Why do you kill people?" Castiel felt curiosity seep into his eyes, curiosity that helped him get through college.

"None of your business," Dean snapped, but he found himself continuing. "When I was young, and my dad would…Just, killing people gives me power. I need it."

Cas, despite himself, began feeling deep sadness for the disturbed, twisted man that sat on his bed. "What did your dad do to you?"

Memories that answered Cas' question floated through Dean's mind, but he pushed them away like he always did. He felt his rage grow until it boiled out of him. "HE BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF ME, THAT'S WHAT! FOR NOT OBEYING TO THE LETTER, FOR NOT BEING THE PERFECT SON! THEN HE'D LEAVE FOR MONTHS ON END, AND ME AND SAMMY WOULD SLOWLY STARVE! WHY DO YOU CARE SO MUCH?" Dean sprung up and thrust his knife onto Cas' throat with a shaking hand. He glared into Castiel's eyes and hated that he still couldn't bring himself to draw blood.

Castiel felt all of his fear seep away, leaving behind sadness and pity. "I'm so sorry," he all but whispered, and Dean's glare softened. "I understand. There are other ways to express your pent-up emotions, however."

Dean straightened up and tucked his knife away. "No chick-flick moments. I have to kill you."

Cas tilted his head. "If you truly think it will make you feel better, go ahead and kill me. But remember, Dean, you are not alone. If you want, I can help you. You don't have to live like this." Cas didn't know where his newfound peace was flowing from, but he meant every word he said.

Dean looked like he was considering it. "How do I know you're not planning to call the police the second I let you free?"

Castiel locked Dean's beautiful green eyes in a long stare. "You have my word."

Dean sat on Cas' bed, his face thoughtful. Finally, Dean looked up, and his eyes were glistening with tears. "You can't help me. No one can."

Pulling out his gun and pointing it at Castiel, Dean fired.

…...

Cliffhanger! Don't worry, Castiel will not die!

Also, like I said above, Lucifer, Sam, and Gabe will soon enter the story! You have been warned…


	5. A Promise

If you reviewed, thank you very very very much! I'm sorry I waited so long to update!

TheCandyChild: I know exactly how you feel lol. Poor Cas!

pyroleigh: I'm so happy you like it!

crankthatphan: A little goes a long way :D

fairytailasaurus: What an adventure! At least I get to explore the grand canyon now :P And that was totally accurate Spanish lol now I will updatido…

…

As Dean stared at Cas, he felt the blood drain out of his face.

The man, only upright from the bounds on his chair, had a very pale face and it looked like he'd aged twenty years.

Dean looked up, away from his victim.

He looked up at the hole in the ceiling. He hated himself.

Looking back down at Cas, Dean resisted the urge to go wipe the white powder from his plaster off his face and hair. He resisted the urge to rest a cool washcloth on the man's face until he woke up from his faint.

"So this is what it comes to," Dean told the unconscious but unharmed form. "Apparently, I can't even kill you."

Dean didn't know what happened when he fired, but somehow, Cas' blue eyes drove into his soul and Dean found himself pointing his gun at the ceiling at the last second. Castiel had mouthed a silent, shocked _Thank you_ before fainting, and Dean felt weak in the knees.

Now he would have more problems than before.

Dean still didn't fully trust Cas to not call the police, but he no longer trusted himself to kill Cas, either.

"Better let him out when he isn't angry at me," Dean reasoned, and he used his knife to cut the man's bonds.

Castiel immediately fell forward, and when Dean caught him and gently took him to his bed, he ignored the tingles that came from the contact.

They were probably just nerves, anyway.

A startled gasp came from the bed, and Dean turned to see that Cas was awake, confused, and afraid.

"I am untied?" Castiel rubbed his arms to regain their feeling as he sat up and stared at Dean.

"Maybe." Dean cleared his throat. "But if you try to escape or call the police, it's lights out for you."

Cas tried to feel trapped and angry, but he just felt relieved. "I won't go back on my promise."

"Yeah, we'll see." Dean tried not to make it too obvious that he was guarding the door, but Castiel was staring too hard at his face to notice. Dean felt his face heating up as Cas' serious blue eyes searched his face.

Finally, Cas spoke. "My…family is coming today."

"Your family?" Dean stood up straight, on alert. "What did you tell them?"

"Nothing," Cas replied truthfully. "It's my birthday. They always do this."

Dean felt his world reel, and he struggled to process the new information. "Today's your birthday?"

Cas frowned. "You aren't focused on the fact that my family is coming over?"

But Dean couldn't hear him. It was too much to take in.

"Stay there," he ordered Cas; and then he stormed to the kitchen and punched the wall.

Feelings were flooding into Dean; feelings that he always pushed away. Feelings that were best left behind.

But, unlike all the other times, this time, the feelings took over. Dean felt guilty for capturing Cas on his birthday; he felt guilty for almost shooting the man.

Dean felt sad that he wasn't going to Sammy's graduation; he felt sad that John had raised him to be such a monster, by never being there and being no help when he was there.

Dean felt tired; a bone-crushing weariness that sucked the strength out of his soul and made him wonder why he was still living.

Dean also felt strangely romantic, but he was _not_ going to address why he felt like that.

Without warning, Dean flung open Castiel's kitchen cabinets and threw his plates and glasses out, letting them smash on the ground. He overturned the table and relished the thunk it made on the floor.

Blood poured freely from cuts on his hands and tears began pouring from his eyes as Dean began punching the wall and smashing more of Castiel's items.

It was too much, it was all too much, and Dean just wanted the horror of his life to end.

Dean released a pained yell as he continued to demolish Castiel's house, and eventually he stopped breaking things and dropped to the ground, violently sobbing.

His emotions and thoughts and heartbeat were loud in his ears, so loud that he failed to hear the other man coming.

Dean flinched when hands touched him, but the hands weren't violent, and arms wrapped around his body.

It was Castiel. "I'm here to save you," he whispered into Dean's ear, and Dean already felt his heart rate begin to decrease.

As Cas continued to hug Dean tightly, he tried to stem his flow of tears. "Winchesters don't cry," John would always say, and then he would punish Dean more.

But Castiel was different. "Let it out, Dean. Let it all out," he said, and Dean did.

He cried for his innocent self back when his mom died; the first day John had laid a hand on him. He cried for all the times he was left alone, in charge of Sammy, for weeks and months on end without enough food. He cried for the FBI training he was giving and for all the murders he committed using it. He cried and he cried; with Castiel tightly holding him and whispering comfort into his ears.

And then it was over.

Dean took a shaky breath and pulled away from the other man's arms. Wiping his eyes on his sleeve, Dean looked over at Castiel. "Why?" he asked.

Cas stared into his eyes with his intense gaze, but strangely, Dean felt no embarrassment. "You needed it."

Dean tried to smile. "Are you gonna call the cops now?" he asked, trying to make a joke to relieve his mixed feelings.

"I promised you," Cas replied, making no move to scoot away from Dean. "I do not intend to call the police."

Dean ran a hand through his hair, taking another shaky breath. His head felt confused, but it was not overwhelming like before.

Cas glanced at his watch.

Suddenly, Dean sat up straight. John had trained him to hear when a car was being pulled up in the front of the house, although that lesson was unintentional and was tested whenever John would return after months of being gone.

Castiel heard the people coming as they walked up to his front door, chattering away.

Dean and Cas looked into each other's eyes, one gaze frightened and the other sad.

And then the doorbell rang.

…

Who could it be?

And what did you think?


	6. Nosy

Sorry about reposting the chapter! It was 1 am and I mixed them up and I HAD NO WIFI ALL DAY...but here you go!

Thank you for the reviews! I am so, so, so sorry for the long wait!

pyroleigh: Good guess :)

crankthatphan: You'll see who's there soon enough…

fairytailasaurus: Being stuck here on Raxicoriofallipatorius with the Slitheen (who are not the best conversationalists), I felt that it was only fair you almost fell off the canyon lmao. Also, I loved reading your speculations. Your long reviews are hilarious :D

…

As Gabriel looked down at his watch and tapped his foot, he heard Luc sigh from behind him.

"Why are we even here again?" Lucifer crossed his arms and pouted.

Anna turned to glare at her older brother. "Be nice. If you weren't here, there would only be three of us." She motioned to herself, Gabriel, and Castiel's best friend, Balthazar.

Luc rolled his eyes. "I know, I know. Samandriel got sick, Raphael stayed to take care of him, and Michael can't tolerate my presence for more than five minutes. Long, boring story short, I'm stuck here with you guys."

"Speaking of five minutes and being stuck here," Gabe said, his mouth twisted in a smile, "what's Castiel up to?"

"If he doesn't open the door soon, I'm going to kick it in," Bal said with a lazy grin.

Luckily, the door swung open and there Castiel stood. His eyes were very shifty, and it was obvious he was hiding something. Gabriel's older brother sense started tingling.

"Look, now's not a good time," Castiel said, obviously confused that three of his brothers were missing and a certain one was present.

"Not a good time?" Gabe asked, pretending to be hurt. "Cassie, we're family!" he cried dramatically, draping an arm over his brother's shoulder.

As he did so, Gabriel caught a glimpse inside the house and his mouth dropped open. "What happened in here?"

It looked to Gabe like a bomb had gone off. If something in Castiel's house wasn't currently smashed, it would look very out of place.

"What is it?" Anna asked, craning her neck to look beyond Castiel and Gabe.

"Nothing," Cas responded, shoving Gabriel back, who stepped on Lucifer's toe and earned himself a dirty look.

"That's obviously not nothing." Lucifer had an ironic smile on his mouth as he looked at the wreckage that lay beyond.

Seeing that Castiel was a second away from closing the door on them, Gabriel spoke quickly. "What if we help you clean up, hmm? No questions asked."

Castiel thought over the question and finally nodded his head. "Fine. But there's someone who I want you to meet first."

Very dramatically, Gabriel shoved a twenty dollar bill in Bal's hand.

Balthazar cackled at his best friend. "I knew you were in a relationship!" Turning to Gabe, he added snidely. "Twenty more says it's a guy."

Gabriel reached into his pocket, but Castiel stepped aside and ushered them into the house. "I'm not in a relationship. It's just a friend."

Balthazar waved a hand as he stepped into the demolished house. "But the real question is, is it a guy friend or a girl friend?"

Before Cas could answer, a man in a leather jacket stepped into the room. His red-rimmed eyes suggested either exhaustion or tears, but his outward demeanor seemed carefree. "I'm Dean," he greeted gruffly.

"Dean-o!" Gabriel reached out and shook the man's hand. "Nice to meet you!"

Anna smiled uncomfortably. "Hi."

Lucifer groaned.

"Dean, this is my family," Cas said. "Gabriel, Balthazar, Anna, and Lucifer."

Dean shifted and grimaced. "They're here to celebrate your birthday?" he asked, and Castiel nodded the affirmative. "One second," he told the incomers as he dragged Cas into the kitchen.

Surreptitiously, Gabriel snuck over to the kitchen to hear what the stranger and Castiel were saying.

"—say nothing, understand?" Dean was asking.

Then came Castiel's rumble. "A promise is a promise."

"It better stay a promise or I'm going to cut more than the phone lines. I'm your friend, got it? We met at college."

"Alright, Dean," Castiel confirmed. "College friends."

As he heard their footsteps, Gabriel dashed back to the group and made it seem like he hadn't been eavesdropping.

Nobody else noticed a thing.

…

Castiel graciously ordered a pizza which they sat on the floor to eat, since everything in Cas' house had been smashed for a reason which hadn't been shared.

Balthazar, of course, was the one to question Cas about his new "friend" (Gabriel still wasn't sure what Dean was to his brother).

"So, Cassie," he said, eyeing the way Dean was sitting with his shoulder pressing against Castiel. "How do you know Dean?"

After a pause only Gabriel noticed, Cas answered. "He goes to college with me."

"Great. Another goody-two-shoes," Lucifer muttered.

Anna went to shush him, but Dean looked straight into Luc's eyes. The expression on his face was strange, and his twisted smile seemed to be saying _how wrong you are._ Lucifer quickly averted his eyes, and the moment passed.

"So, what's your major?" Anna asked when the silence got too long.

Dean shrugged. "Undecided."

Gabriel couldn't help but take note of the way Castiel snuck a scared glance at Dean. He didn't know if he was being paranoid, but something wasn't adding up.

"Do you have any candy?" Gabe smiled innocently at his brother, who just rolled his eyes and motioned to show him.

As they left the room, Gabriel prided himself on being able to find an excuse that both got Castiel alone and satisfied his sweet tooth.

The second they entered the kitchen, Gabriel cornered his brother. "What's going on with Dean?"

Cas looked up at him with his intense blue eyes. "I already told you, we're not dating."

Gabe scoffed. "I know that! But what's with all the lying and broken dishes and everything?"

"None of your business."

"Oh, little brother," Gabriel chuckled. "Either you tell me, or I'm telling the others."

Castiel knew that it wasn't a good idea to get on Gabe's bad side, so he pursed his lips. "Fine. But you cannot call the police."

"Call the police?" Gabriel raised his eyebrows.

The night was about to get a whole lot more interesting.

…

I hope you liked the chapter!

I thought you guys deserved some fluff after all the whumpage :)


	7. Peace

Special thanks to crankthatphan for reviewing!

…

When Gabriel took Cas to the kitchen, Dean tensed up. He could tell that the candy excuse was not the real reason Cas' brother had wanted to get out of the room.

Gabe probably had figured out something he shouldn't have. And while Dean could trust Cas to stick to his promise, if Gabriel found out about Dean, there was no telling what he'd do. Call the police, probably.

So when Balthazar and Lucifer got into an argument about the best football team and Anna took sides, Dean slipped out of the room to spy on Cas and his brother.

Inside the kitchen, when Dean poked his head through the door, Gabriel was sitting on the counter and biting into a large chocolate bar.

Cas was putting away a box of more chocolate, and it made Dean wonder if Gabe _had_ just wanted candy.

But then Cas' brother spoke, and it was all over.

"Serial killer, huh?" Gabe mused, taking a gigantic bite of chocolate. "You need to have a better taste in guys."

Dean's first instinct would be to barge in, but Gabriel didn't seem to be calling the police or freaking out.

Also, the blush that appeared on Castiel's face was kind of cute, but Dean didn't want to open that can of worms.

"We are not together," Cas was saying. "I wanted to welcome him to the neighborhood!"

Dean was slightly gratified when Gabe defended his position. "But you only invite over the hot ones!"

"Just because I am gay does not mean that I hit on everyone I see." Cas pulled Gabriel off his counter.

Gabe resisted, but allowed himself to be dragged from where he was perched. "You always have been so closed up," he joked, ruffling his brother's hair.

Dean had to bite his lip at that. Castiel and Gabriel were behaving just like him and Sam, and Dean shuddered to think that he'd almost killed Gabe's brother.

How many other people's lives had he ruined?

But no. Dean wasn't going to think like that. Just because Dean didn't have the nerve to kill one man did not mean that he was going to give up his whole life.

Dean was not a wuss. He would not chicken out now, of all times.

Dean quickly shook away his tangled thoughts and hurried to the group on the floor when he saw Cas and Gabriel coming out of the kitchen.

When he sat, Gabriel narrowed his eyes at Dean. After a pause, he slowly nodded.

Dean was baffled.

"—Dean? Dean?" Castiel caught his attention.

"Yeah?" Dean asked suspiciously.

Balthazar was the one who answered. "I asked you, what's your stance on the Raiders?"

Everyone grew quiet, and Lucifer slowly cracked his knuckles.

Balthazar smiled at Dean's obvious discomfort. "Remember, whatever you say can and will be held against you."

Looking around at the intense faces, Dean felt a warmth seep into his heart. Although he wasn't part of the family (though neither was Balthazar), they had clearly accepted him and were already kinder than John had ever been.

Dean laughed out loud. "What's not to like about them?"

Half of the table grew into an uproar, and the other half responded, each side arguing for their favorite football team.

Dean sat back and watched the friendly bickering. He wasn't the only one, however.

Across the circle sat Cas, and seeing Dean's gaze on him, he winked.

It was the most amazing wink Dean had ever received.

…

Near the end of the night, Castiel's family and friend gathered up their belongings and said good-bye.

It was kind of funny how they all said they hoped to see Dean again soon. They were all so innocent.

Even Gabriel said it, though he dropped his usual joking demeanor and his intense gaze bore into Dean's soul.

When they had all gone, Dean turned to Cas. "So…" he said.

Cas' blue eyes found his green ones. "So," he repeated.

"What now?" Dean glanced around the room. "If I leave and never come back, will you not call the police?"

"I would not." Cas replied in his gravelly voice. He paused. "But are you sure you want to leave?"

Dean rubbed his hand on the gun in his jacket pocket. It helped center him. "You want me to help clean your place first, is that it?"

Dean reached down to start cleaning, and Castiel took his arm. The touch was electric, and Dean immediately froze.

"That is not what I mean."

Dean straightened up.

Cas flicked his eyes downward. "I mean, my family approved of you."

"Yeah, speaking of that, you told Gabriel?!" Dean felt betrayed in some odd sense.

"I had to," Cas responded. "He heard us talking."

Dean started pacing the room. "Does he usually react that strangely to news? Well, I could tell that he has a different sense of humor."

Cas leaned against the wall. "Do not underestimate Gabriel. He can be very powerful, and he can read people. So if he decided that you weren't dangerous, then he didn't need to call the police."

"You make it sound like he's magical." Dean snorted. Inwardly, he felt a sense of pride that was strange considering that it only came from someone thinking he wasn't dangerous.

Usually, Dean looked to be dangerous. Intimidating people, a skill from John, was a handy tool in harnessing power.

Apparently when he was around Cas, everything was different.

"Look," Cas said, "It's clear that no big plans will be made tonight. If you want, you can stay. We can figure everything out in the morning."

Dean was surprised to find himself nodding. "I'd like that, actually."

And when he was in a sleeping bag listening to Castiel snore half an hour later, Dean felt no regret whatsoever.

He felt peace.


	8. Yes

Once again, sorry for not updating sooner and thank you if you reviewed!

crankthatphan: I didn't base the story off of that song but I looked it up and IT FITS SO PERFECTLY OMG

Fairytailasaurus: Thanks for your double reviews :) Also, wowwww, thanks for leaving me with the Leviathans like that. Gallifrey is safe a few billion years from here and I managed to find the portal out so here I am and luckily for you I hold no grudge (purgatory man Purgatory!). Also, enjoy the Sherlock Christmas Special if it's out yet—idk since I'm not in that fandom. Anyway, enough talking and ENJOY THE SHOW…

…

In the morning, when Dean awoke in Castiel's room on a spare mattress, the events of the previous night overwhelmed him and he rushed to the bathroom and vomited.

When that was done and Dean managed to get his emotions in check, he walked over to the kitchen. Cas was still asleep, and the sun had only just begun to rise, but Dean had never been one to sleep in.

Mulling over what a mess his life had become, Dean began searching through Cas' cupboards until he found food suitable for breakfast.

Just as he had cracked an egg, his phone rang.

Dean didn't have to look at the phone to know who was calling. Sammy.

And somehow the magic of Castiel's house got to him, and Dean pressed talk.

"Hey," came his brother's voice, sounding as if he hadn't expected Dean to answer, but that he was glad Dean had.

"Hi, Sammy." Dean had no idea what he was doing. When was the last time Dean had seen or talked to his younger brother?

"I wasn't sure if you got my message, so—"

Dean cut him off. "I got it."

"So can you come?" Sam's voice was both anxious and hopeful.

Dean shook his head to center himself. He could not make it. He had to first clean up this whole Cas mess, and then maybe hit the road…

Cas walked into the kitchen right as Sam asked, "Dean? You still there?"

And the sight of the sleepy Cas with horrible bedhead shook Dean to the core. He found himself responding, "Yeah, Sammy. I can make it. I'll see you then."

When he responded, Sam sounded so cute and relieved that Dean was flooded with memories and had to bite back tears.

When he hung up, Dean found Cas' eyes on him.

"What?" he asked, feeling defensive.

Cas only smiled. "I know it is none of my business, but who was that on the phone?"

Dean tucked his phone away. "My brother Sam."

Cas nodded, not removing his eyes from Dean. Feeling uncomfortable, Dean continued preparing breakfast. When the silence (and Cas' intent stare) got too much, Dean elaborated. "He's been wanting me to come to his graduation."

"And do you want to go?"

Dean didn't know how Cas could stand in place for so long without moving.

"Not really."

Cas stepped closer. "Would you want me to come, too?"

Now Dean felt conflicted. Everything that he'd so carefully constructed—his murder plan, his career (or lack thereof), the wall separating him and Sammy—was crashing down.

And though Dean didn't want Sam to meet the guy he almost killed, Dean could tell that the graduation would be a lot easier to handle if Castiel was with him.

Castiel smiled as Dean popped the toast out of his toaster. "I could even bring along Gabriel."

For the second time that day, Dean found himself agreeing to something because of Cas.

…

When they had finished breakfast, Cas left. "I have to go to work," he explained as he tightened his tie (which, Dean noticed, was twisted backwards—not that he was looking at the other man's chest). "I'll be back at 5 tonight."

Dean waved good-bye, and once Castiel had left, he dropped against the wall. "So am I now…living with Cas?" he asked himself.

Dean had silently been hoping Cas would let him stay. Still, it was a little strange that Castiel didn't even ask him to leave or come near the topic. And now Dean didn't know what to do.

Hoping Cas wouldn't still kick him out in the afternoon, Dean canceled his room at the hotel. All his possessions were in the Impala, so he didn't have to worry about getting anything.

After that, Dean put his building skills to work and fixed all the items he had broken in Cas' house. Some things, like the pretty vase that used to hold flowers before it was shattered, couldn't be fixed, so Dean drove out and replaced them.

He felt good once he finished and surveyed Cas' house. Everything looked how it did before, down to the last flower and tablecloth. Seeing it now, Dean thought it to be too sterile and unlived in, save for the picture of Cas and his family that was in his room.

Against his better judgement (though all of Dean's choices were these days), Dean decided to go out and get Cas one more item, though not one Dean had smashed. This painting was one he had kept hidden away in a storage unit, ever since he had stolen it.

The original plan was to sell the realistic copy for money, as the real thing had a permanent home in the Metropolitan Museum of Art. However, just like now, Dean had chickened out.

The painting, called View of Toledo, was a beautiful, almost haunting landscape of a castle on a hill beneath a cloudy sky.

Wanting to keep it but not having a home to put it in, Dean decided to keep it in the storage unit until he could find a place to put it.

And now, although Dean loved the painting, he found himself wanting Castiel to have it. Although Dean had never believed in fate, this felt pretty damn close.

Hanging up the painting, Dean felt himself watching the clock, waiting for Cas to see what he had done.

Dean had to pinch himself to make sure he was actually awake and that none of this was an amazing dream.

Cas no longer felt like Dean's victim.

Cas was his friend.

…

I hope you liked the chapter!

Destiel is beginning to blossom; I hope I haven't rushed it too much. There will be some hinting at Sabriel, but that's not the main focus of the story.

Also, the View of Toledo is a very real painting that I felt fit Dean's mood and the story's essence. If you're curious, you can look it up.

And please review!


	9. I Actually Liked It

Thank you, crankthatphan, for reviewing so fast! I'm so happy you like the story!

Here is another update! Hooray!

…

When Castiel returned home from work, he was blown away and actually quite flattered.

His whole place was spotless, everything restored in its rightful place. At first, Castiel felt a jolt of fear. Had Dean cleaned to wipe up his tracks? Did Dean make a run for it? Was he gone?

Stepping into his living room, Castiel felt a shiver run down his spine. A painting sat on the wall, but it was like nothing he'd seen before. The picture was in dark colors; the sky reminding him of his own stormy blue eyes and the hill reminding him of Dean's green eyes.

Castiel's fear diminished, replaced by sadness.

He hoped Dean didn't put up that painting for Castiel to remember him by.

Castiel didn't know what to feel. Twenty four hours ago, Castiel would have been jumping for joy, seeing that everything was tidy and Dean may have left.

Forty eight hours ago, and Castiel would have wondered where his dinner guest had vanished to.

Seventy two hours ago would find Castiel not even knowing Dean's name.

So much had happened in the past three days, and Castiel had felt a ride of emotions.

Somehow, Dean had wormed his way into Castiel's heart. Now, this was not a natural thing, and it didn't make any sense to him. Dean had been willing to _kill_ Castiel, and the man was obviously not emotionally stable, judging by the way he'd blown through Castiel's house like a hurricane.

Castiel wondered if the man was still planning to kill him, but he brushed the thought away. Dean would never. Dean tried to, but couldn't.

And Castiel was almost happy that if he died, at least it would be at Dean's hands.

How messed up was he?

Castiel felt his heart almost beat out of his chest when a throat was cleared behind him. Whirling around, Cas saw Dean.

"Dean! You're still here!" Cas said happily, although his voice did not quite convey his emotions.

"Hey, Cas," Dean sounded unsure. "You want me to leave?"

"No." Castiel did not elaborate.

Dean grinned and motioned to the wall. "You like it?"

"Very much, Dean. Thank you," Castiel responded solemnly. Then a thought occurred to him. "When's your brother's graduation?"

Dean remembered the events of the morning and silently cursed his predicament, but his heart wasn't in it. "It's tomorrow."

"No wonder your brother called."

Dean felt himself getting annoyed. Yeah, he had left answering a little late, but considering that Dean hadn't been planning to go, he felt that his actions were justified. "Can Gabriel still make it?"

Cas smiled and nodded. "He never has any plans. Only free time."

Dean breathed a sigh of relief and checked his watch. "Look at the time. I'll go start dinner."

As Dean went to exit the room, he felt a hand touch his arm. Turning, Dean saw Castiel shaking his head.

"It's fine, Dean," Cas said. "I can do it. You've had a long day."

"I've had longer," Dean muttered, but he knew Cas wouldn't let him make dinner.

Instead of retreating to Castiel's room, Dean followed him to the kitchen.

Cas crossed his arms. "Dean, it's _fine_ ," he repeated. "You've already done too much for me."

Dean shook his head. "I'm not here to cook for you."

Castiel looked surprised. "You're not?"

"No," Dean said, cracking a smile. "I'm here to cook _with_ you."

…

After a wonderful meal together, Castiel and Dean retreated to Cas' room, where they each sat on their respective sleeping areas.

"Thank you for that painting," Cas said once more, and Dean felt a thrill creep up his spine. "It really means a lot."

Dean laid back on his mattress on the floor. "It's the best I could do, seeing as I broke everything in your house."

"You needed to release those feelings," Cas replied, lying back on his bed. "It was the healthy thing to do."

Shame burned Dean's cheeks a bright red. "I was handling them."

Castiel sat up in his bed and looked over at Dean. "I think you and I both know what the truth is here."

Dean sat up as well and ran a hand through his hair. "Still, sorry I brought you into this. And," his voice grew to a whisper, "sorry for almost killing you."

"Oh, Dean." Cas got off of his bed and sat next to Dean, putting a hand around his shoulder. Although Dean was the one who had tried to kill Castiel, Cas felt a responsibility for the man's well-being and he harbored no feelings of unhappiness towards Dean. "I forgive you."

Tears glistening in his eyes, Dean looked into Cas' face, almost as if searching for something. "How can I make up all the lives I've taken? I'll the families I've broken up? I can't do this anymore!"

Cas squeezed Dean into a hug. "This is the first step," he said solemnly. "You know what you did wrong, and you don't do it again. I've made bad decisions in my life, Dean."

"Not as bad as this," Dean said, looking down at his lap.

"Not as bad," Castiel agreed, "but nobody's perfect, and everybody can change their ways. That's what makes us human." Cas moved a hand to Dean's chin and pushed his head up gently, so they locked gazes. "I believe in you, Dean."

Neither of them fully expected what happened next.

Dean moved his head forward and so did Castiel, and suddenly they were sharing a passionate kiss, lips crashing into each other.

Dean's hands snaked around and clasped Cas' back, holding him tightly. Cas cupped Dean's face between his hands.

All their spoken and unspoken thoughts, feelings, and worries were condensed into one perfect, drawn-out moment.

And then it was over.

Dean sprung away, wiping his mouth. "Oh my God," he said. "Cas, I'm so sorry!"

Cas pushed a hand through his hair. "No, Dean, it is I who should be sorry."

Dean looked around the room. "I should be going." He stood up and began gathering his things, trying to leave as soon as possible.

But as Dean touched the handle, Cas spoke. "Dean, wait."

Dean turned, eyes on the floor. He couldn't bear to look at Cas after what had happened. "Yeah?"

"There is nothing shameful in what happened," Castiel said, and Dean felt the sense that Cas could read his mind.

"So…you're okay with it?" Dean asked doubtfully. He had a hard time believing that the man who he intended to kill was fine with making out with him, of all people.

"I actually liked it." Cas' blue eyes were sincere and serious.

Dean slowly put his bag down. "So did I."

Suddenly, Dean found himself sitting on the mattress, and all he could think about was Cas' ruffled hair, Cas' heartbeat, Cas' blue, blue eyes, Cas' slightly chapped lips.

And then they were kissing again.

And it was magical.

…

Hope you liked the chapter! Just like every single time, please review!


	10. Graduation

Thank you for all the reviews! There are never too many!

fairytailasaurus: I'm glad taking you to the hospital saved you! A lot's happened since Raxicoriofallipatorius! AND YES THE FEELS I AM GLAD YOU FEEL THEM

crankthatphan: Thank you for reviewing so much! I can always count on you to comment :D

goanago: It was great seeing each update for each chapter as you read them! And I'm glad you liked the things to search up :)

…

In the morning, Dean woke up with no idea why he felt so at peace and relaxed. For the first time in ages, it seemed that he'd gotten a full night's sleep and none of his joints were protesting, which was weird, considering that Cas had left him a mattress to sleep on…

Looking around, Dean felt a wash of panic sweep over him. He wasn't on the mattress; he was in Castiel's freaking bed!

"What did I do?" Dean muttered. "Did I piss him off? How'd I get here?"

Dean closed his eyes and thought back to the previous night. He remembered making dinner with Cas, talking to Cas, and—

"Son of a bitch!"

Dean remembered.

 _I hope Cas didn't leave because of me. I know he said he liked it, but people say anything when they're afraid. He probably lied so I didn't murder him._

Pushing thoughts of Cas from his head, Dean checked in on himself.

 _Last time I checked, I'm straight. One hundred percent._

And Dean couldn't bring to think otherwise. John had been a grade-A homophobe, and even after years of pushing against him, John's physical lessons left an imprint of pain in his mind.

But somehow, when Castiel stepped into the room with a breakfast platter in his hand, John disappeared and Cas was the only thing that mattered in Dean's life besides Sammy.

"Good morning, Dean," Cas said, smiling when he saw Dean's admiring (if not loving) gaze. "How did you sleep?"

Dean sat up in the bed and took the tray from the other man's hands. "Great, actually."

"After you eat, we should hit the road," Castiel advised, taking a seat at the end of the bed. "Gabriel will meet us there."

Dean groaned when he remembered his brother's graduation. He'd been looking to spend the day with Cas.

Still, when Castiel put his hand on Dean's leg, which was underneath the blanket, Dean felt warmth spread up to his heart and he knew the ceremony wouldn't be bad if Cas was there.

It was almost like Cas was his guardian angel.

Shaking away his thoughts, Dean dug into his breakfast. He already felt happier about the day.

…

When they reached the ceremony in Dean's impala, it was with only a few minutes to spare.

Sam spotted the car right away and detached himself from his fellow students standing all together in their robes.

"You came!" he said to Dean, as though he hadn't expected Dean to come. Dean couldn't blame him. They hadn't talked in years.

"I couldn't miss it, Sammy," Dean said, and he enveloped his brother in a hug.

Breaking away, Sam looked Cas over. "Who's this?"

Cas smiled shyly. "I'm Castiel. You can call me Cas like Dean does."

"Okay," Sam said, smiling back. "How do you guys know each other? Are you friends?"

"He's my boyfriend."

The second the words left his mouth, Dean wished he could take them back. That wasn't what he had meant to say, but the damage was done and Sam was cocking his head at them and a blush was overcoming his cheeks.

Dean couldn't bring himself to look at Cas for fear of his reaction. Would Cas hate him now? Would he leave?

But gently, Castiel took Dean's hand within his. "Yes, I am."

Looking over into his eyes, Dean only saw happiness and love.

Sam broke the moment. "Well, the ceremony's starting soon. I better be going. Nice to meet you, Cas."

With that, Sam hurried over to his friends, hair streaming behind him in the wind.

"Well, he certainly took that very well," Cas remarked.

"Him? What about you?" Dean hoped Cas was willing to be his boyfriend, but he had to make sure. "You certainly took it well."

"Well," Cas mused, "I had two options. One, express my feelings for you through coded words and intense stares that everyone but you apparently will see right through or…I could just tell you. See how easy I made it?"

Dean stared at Cas for a moment. "I have such a brilliant boyfriend," he finally said in awe.

"No," Cas replied. "I do."

…

As Castiel had expected, his brother arrived halfway through the ceremony. Luckily for him, Sam, having a last name beginning with "W," had not gone up yet.

When it was his turn to go up, Dean couldn't contain his tears. Here was his baby brother, all grown up, but had Dean been there for him? Had Dean made it easier for him to succeed?

Had Dean truly protected his brother like he'd promised?

No. When Sam needed protection and love, Dean was out murdering. He was out ruining others' lives, while ruining Sam's in the process.

And now Sammy was graduating, successful and happy and bearing no grudge to Dean.

Dean couldn't believe it.

As Gabriel lounged back in his seat clapping, Cas produced a tissue from his pocket and handed it to Dean.

"Thanks," Dean said. Attempting to stop his tears by making a joke (a good evasion tactic he'd learned), Dean added, "That's the second time in two days you've seen me cry."

But Cas didn't laugh.

He leaned in, and then they were making out as graduation caps rained down upon them and the outside world seemed to be revolving around their passionate kiss.

Gabe, being Gabe, stared at them and laughed. "Oh, Cassie, I knew it."

"You know him?" a voice asked from behind Gabriel.

"Yeah," Gabe said, spinning around. "I'm his brother. Gabe."

The other guy, who was tall and (if Gabriel admitted it to himself) handsome, laughed. "That's my brother with yours. I'm Sam." Sam offered his hand.

And maybe it was something about the way their brothers were kissing in the backround, or maybe it was due to Gabe's outgoing personality and Sam's unrestrained passion, but suddenly, Dean and Cas were not the only two people making out at the ceremony.

Gabe and Sam locked lips tightly, pressed against each other, one on his tiptoes and the other bent over.

For a perfect moment, everything stopped.

Nothing would ever be the same again.

…

THE END!

Well, that certainly was a wild ride. I hope you guys were satisfied with this last chapter! And please, press the button underneath this and leave a review!

Also, if you're into comedy, you might want to check out my other Supernatural story, Uno-Natural.

And I may soon be writing an angsty Fallen!Cas story, so keep your eyes open for that!

Thanks!


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